Joining – A Powerful Bonding and Healing Technique
By Peter Granger
Joining is a way of bonding with another person in a way that brings us incredibly close on both emotional and spiritual levels and provides a safe and natural way of healing. This method was originally developed by relationship counselor Lency Spezzano. It makes use of our best connection device – our eyes. Our eyes have been called the “portal of our souls” because when we make strong eye contact, it seems that we can see into the very soul of another person. This is exactly what we aim to do in Joining. It is a way of establishing a loving connection with anyone. It has the power to heal any problem or layer of pain because it re-establishes our connection with healing love. We can think of this love on either the human or the spiritual plane, or both. When you first try joining it is easier to do it with somebody you trust. When you get more confident you can do it with other people, even your partner!
How to Join
Take two comfortable chairs and place them so you can sit close to and facing your Joining partner. Make sure you are comfortable and relaxed. Playing some relaxing or emotionally meaningful music will also help. You can gently hold hands if you like. Now make eye contact with the other person and try to maintain it for as long as you can. You can blink as normal – the intention is not to stare, but to naturally look into the other person’s eyes for an extended period of time. Try to Join for at least twenty minutes. You may find it easier to focus on just one eye – whichever is most comfortable and gives you the deepest contact.
At first, most people find it hard to maintain sustained eye contact. In social settings making too much eye contact can appear threatening, but here we are deliberately allowing ourselves to maintain the contact as long as we wish. You may feel embarrassed or awkward or you may find it hard to remain serious and have a strong urge to talk. It is possible that you feel disturbed by this level of intimacy and want to end the Joining.
The resistance you may be feeling comes from the fear of emotional intimacy. We are not used to allowing ourselves to get this emotionally close to other people. With such strong eye contact, it feels as if the other person can see right into the heart of our being. We fear that they will know us too well, including all our secrets and any low self-worth. These are aspects of ourselves that we have tried to hide, so we may now be reluctant to reveal them. But remember that it is our low self-worth that causes us to keep ourselves separate in relationships and prevents us from healing our issues. Although Joining can be difficult at first, the process is intended to unearth our resistance to wholehearted connection with another person and then burn through it to find the love and self-esteem that lies underneath.
If you persevere with Joining, a number of interesting things will usually happen. You should start feeling some emotion – it could be positive or negative. Try not to judge or control the emotion, just let it flow naturally. The emotion is welling up from your subconscious as well as your deeper unconscious mind. You may feel anger, sadness, loss or other negative emotions. You may cry – don’t judge this, just let it happen without resistance. Keep feeling into these emotions as you maintain the eye contact. It is likely that you and your partner will mirror each other’s emotions. Look into their eyes and imagine that you are seeing right into their emotions. What are they feeling? Feel love and appreciation for the other person and pour this into them. If you find this hard, imagine they are somebody you love dearly, such as a child or a parent. As you feel the love for them and transfer it to your Joining partner through their eyes, they will feel it and respond. See all the love within them. If you have a spiritual belief, see divine love or God in their eyes. The love will then melt away pain and any separation.
As the process continues you will feel much closer to the other person. As the fears evaporate on both sides it is common for both partners to start smiling and laughing. The feelings of love just keep growing. Sometimes a person’s face will change before your eyes – they might look younger and much more relaxed. They may even seem to be limed in light. You will probably come over in a hot flush and feel absolutely wonderful. Some people then go into a blissful state which is full of love and peace – others may laugh uproariously. It is in these moments of intense connection that we most easily experience our higher powers of love, or grace. It is an experience you will never forget! All of us have different styles in the way we feel and express love, so follow what is natural for you.
If you don’t reach these higher states of loving consciousness, do not judge yourself. There is no right way to Join. If you can’t feel anything, just feel that as deeply as you can. The dissociation is our ego’s way of resisting the Joining. Even not feeling is a feeling, so embrace this as much as you can. As you stay with the dissociation, another emotion will eventually come up, and then your Joining will progress naturally. The idea behind Joining is that we are trying to heal through the various layers of fear and negative emotion that prevent us from feeling our loving essence. Sometimes you may just quietly burn through a layer of pain. As you become more practiced in Joining, you will become much more aware of the negative layers and blocks that stand in the way of your happiness. You may also become aware of the way in which some emotions are contained within specific parts of the body.
The “emotional body” has been described in the Eastern traditions of the Chakra system as well as other mind-body systems. We may notice pain or a constriction in certain parts of the body. For instance, during a Joining session we may start off feeling some emotional pain, as a knotted or cramped feeling in the intestinal area. As we continue the session and feel more love, those feelings ease and the emotions may appear to rise up through the body. Sometimes they might get stuck in the throat area. As our connection with our Joining partner strengthens, those feelings may then move up and appear to leave through the top of the head. When I join, I am often aware of a barrier within my temple, almost like a steel plate. This feels like a distinct block to the flow of emotions. As I allow myself to connect and feel love, I can dissolve this block and immediately experience a huge release of any trapped negative emotions. This is accompanied by a sense of lightness in the temple and an even greater openness to love. All of us will feel our emotions differently, but once we can visualize and move them through our bodies, we will find it much easier to release negative emotions.
In a Joining session the fear and negative emotion that most of us carry becomes very evident and it is clear when we let it go. As we Join, we become undefended and surrender to our emotions. As we remove our defenses, we become willing to feel the entirety of our emotions. By facing the depth of our pain and letting it go, we can then experience the heights of our ecstasy. Joining returns us to our essential and authentic state – one of love and connection with the people and world around us. The bliss we might feel during Joining is simply the experience of boundless love that is, in principle, in infinite supply. With practice, Joining becomes one of the most effective and enjoyable experiences in a personal development and healing process. 
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Peter Granger is an acclaimed relationship counselor and life coach. He runs relationship and self-development workshops in the UK. He has recently launched a book called True Love - The Amazing Truth About Love, Relationships & Life. For more free relationship advice and information about his book, go to http://www.iloveyouloveme.com.
Article Source: http://www.Free-Articles-Zone.com
Book Review
The Mastery of Love
By Don Miguel Ruiz
Don Miguel Ruiz was born into a family of healers, and raised in rural Mexico by a curandera (healer) mother and a nagual (shaman) grandfather. A near-death experience changed his life and propelled him into an intensive practice of self-inquiry. Now a nagual himself, from the Eagle Knight lineage, Ruiz is dedicated to sharing his knowledge of the teachings of the ancient Toltec. His other books include The Four Agreements and The Voice of Knowledge.
In The Mastery of Love, don Miguel Ruiz illuminates the fear-based beliefs and assumptions that undermine love and lead to suffering and drama in our relationships. Using insightful stories to bring his message to life, Ruiz shows us how to heal our emotional wounds, recover the freedom and joy that are our birthright, and restore the spirit of playfulness that is vital to loving relationships.
In the Toltec tradition, three fundamental masteries guide us to our true nature, which is happiness, freedom and love.
The first is the Mastery of Awareness. This mastery teaches us to be aware of what we really are. It is the first step toward freedom, because we cannot be free if we don’t know what we are, or what kind of freedom we are looking for. The Toltecs said, “Let us see ourselves with truth,” and they created a mastery just for awareness.
“Just as your body is made by cells, your dreams are made by emotions. There are two main sources of those emotions: One is fear, and all the emotions that come from fear; the other is love, and all the emotions that come from love.” (Page 58)
The second is the Mastery of Transformation, which teaches us how to become spiritual warriors, and stalk our actions and reactions so we can break free of the knowledge that enslaves us. This mastery shows us how to change the dream of our life by changing our agreements and beliefs.
“We are alive and we need to take risks, and if we fail, so what? Who cares? It doesn’t matter. We learn and we move on without judgment. We don’t need to judge; we don’t need to blame or feel guilt. We just need to accept our truth and intend a new beginning.” (Page 114)
The Mastery of Love is the result of the first two masteries. From the Toltec perspective, everything is made of Love. Love is Life itself. When we master Love, we align with the Spirit of Life passing through us. We are no longer the body, or the mind, or the soul; we are Love. Then every action we take is an expression of Love, and Love in action can only produce happiness.
“Every day, you can offer a devotional love to your own body. When you take a shower, when you take a bath, treat your body with all your love, treat your body with honor, with gratitude, with respect. When you eat, take a bite, close your eyes and enjoy the food. That food is an offering to your own body, to the temple where God lives.” (Page 154)
When we master Awareness, Transformation, and Love, we reclaim our divinity and become one with God. This is the goal of the Toltec.
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(Book Summary from www.Amazon.com)
Ryan N. Harrison, MA is a Holistic Health Practitioner in private practice (http://www.BeWholeBeWell.com).
Motivational Tips
Fall In Love With Your Business Again
By Michael Clark
Why did you start your business? Most business owners start their businesses because they desire personal freedom. They want to be their own boss. They have a great idea that they want to try. They are in love with all of these ideas. When you started your business, I bet you were full of passion and excitement. It was like the first days of a new romance. All you could think about or talk about was your business. What an exciting time.
Today, I’d like to ask you to fall in love again. In the time since you started your business, you’ve been through a lot. You’ve worked hard. You’ve had some rewards. Your love of the business has ebbed and flowed. Ask yourself now, are you in love with your business still or has it just turned into a partner, a faithful companion?
If you answered the latter, I have some suggestions for you to rekindle the flame. Some of these are right out of a marriage counselor’s book.
- Take some time away. Absence does make the heart grow fonder. Take a little time off and reconnect with the reasons that you started your business. Reconnect with the excitement you had at the start. Relive the dream. Really let yourself feel what you felt at the start.
- Ask yourself what you really love about your business. Some of the work you love, some of it is just plain old work. Focus on what you enjoy. Appreciate what’s working. Develop systems to make the hard work easier. Delegate the work you don’t enjoy. Get outside help. Do what you love and give the rest away.
- Make a plan. Make a plan to get yourself out of overwhelm and back doing the work that you really enjoy. Put it in writing. Dust off your business plan. Read the first page where you wrote all the exciting stuff about what a great business you have. Having a written plan eases stress and gets you back in charge. You’ll feel powerful with a plan.
- Share your excitement. With your new plan and your renewed vision get out there and tell people about it. Just like after your first dates when that’s all you’d talk about, share your enthusiasm. Share the feelings of freedom you enjoy. Being in love is contagious and you’ll be amazed at the difference this makes in your business and your life.
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About the Author: Start up business resource guide and consultant, Michael Clark has been teaching best small business ideas for over 20 years. Michael is a serial entrepreneur having opened multiple successful small businesses over the last 12 years. For more small business success stories and business resource groups, visit his web site at http://biznbeyond.com.
Article From: http://www.articlescity.com
GCNM Graduate Profile
Phillip Dufrasne, MH
Soon after submitting my final examination materials for the Master Herbalist program, I was very happy to learn that I was one of the many successful graduates of the Global College of Natural Medicine.
I am pleased with my education from GCNM and feel that I can successfully apply everything I’ve learned to help all of my family and friends heal themselves. It is my dream and goal to become a practicing herbalist here in Belgium, in the very near future.
I feel that GCNM has prepared me to learn other holistic health specialities, as well. I look forward to furthering my education by studying acupuncture and naturopathy as I believe both these approaches can help people in a world that tends to be just as “bad” for them as “good.” Now is the time to start talking about wellness. It is also the time to start working in this field.
To me, the most interesting part of GCNM’s Master Herbalist program was the section on how to make herbal remedies. I found the lesson effective and easy to apply. I also thought the Terminology course was full of useful information that I’ll need to know as I start my practice as an herbalist.
One of the pleasant surprises I discovered after enrolling as a GCNM student is how quick the faculty and staff are at responding to questions. Any time I had a question – of any kind – I received a quick answer from the support staff. They don’t leave students in the dark and really want them to achieve success.
As a GCNM graduate with my Master Herbalist certificate, I am very convinced that there is a natural alternative for every disease on the planet today. GCNM really strengthened my faith in the power and reach of holistic health, and in myself. Ever since I was a child, I’ve always wanted to be an herbalist to help others heal themselves by using the gifts of the Earth. My dream has been granted, thanks to the Global College of Natural Medicine.
Learn more about the Global College of Natural Medicine by logging on at http://www.GCNM.com, where you will find details on the school, its programs, tuition, and contact information.
Search online for values in the USDA National Nutrient Database for Standard Reference.
